Bismilahi Rahmani Raheem,
As-salaamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatulah Wa Barakatuhu,
I am caught up between my essay, desitation and exams coming up next month. everything just seem to jumble up and giving me a hard time,Ii cant sit down for seconds and not remember i have so much to do.... aggghhh and the worse thing is i have been reading for my exams since 3 weeks ago but there seem to be no progress, i switched to my essay today but its still not making situations better. Seriously this things don't deserve my time, they are all DUNYA, back in my jahiliya days I wanted to be a RICH economist working in the central bank, I had so much planned out, got aaaa's for my A-levels every thing seemed to be going so well, but now (Alhamdulilah though) I'll rather use my time to do something for the akhira... as I sit about to do some serious econometrics I find out I have no interest what so ever with the work, I feel its just a diffident Whole new world to me and I am caught up because there is basically nothing i can do, my dad will bury me alive if I tell him I don't want to do economics I want to learn Arabic and learn the Quran by hearth and learn the science of the Quran( don't get me wrong he is not against the religion or anything or me learning the list, but am almost at the door to finishing university and it would be waste of his money and TIME). The only thing that motivates me to study now is the fact that my father pays about £20,000 + for me to study and do something good with my life, It makes me feel guilty when I see the little work I am doing :(.. I plan to get a 1st class this term which is very possible(if I work seriously HARD), but I just lack the motivation to study, I go to the library set my books out to study open up my jotter and then the taught of listening to surah Ar-Rahman hits my head send I bring out my ipod and listen, next am like it will not do me bad to listen to surah Qamar, and then surah Mulk, and then an audio lecture, and before Ii Realize the day is OVER!!... I am really confused and caught up, its my responsibility for the dun ya to do well, but also my responsibility for the akhira to strive hard for janah.. It is so hard this days for me to do descent reading or any of this things, there is always something telling me am wasting my time and that just scares me, i might study SO hard for my exams and then die before the day, or i might write the best essay but die a day before i hand it in, and this are just a few of the things that stop me from wanting to do any studying or work. Its all so CONFUSING!!. I just can not balance it....CAN ANY ONE PLEASE HELP ME!! advice, scolding, du'a, any and all is welcome Insh Allah..
Ma-Salaam.
x
2 comments:
Salaam sis,
I think it's important to remember that what your studying isn't JUST for the dunya, it's for the akhira as well. You can use your knowledge to make a difference in the world.. we need more economists with a conscience! The Prophet (s) taught us to have a balance in all aspects of life.. so while you shouldn't be a slave to your studies, listening to Quran all day long and doing little else is hardly a balanced way of living. Your studying can be a form of 'ibadah if done with the right intentions inshallah..
Also don't forget that we ladies need a plan B in life, so we are able to rely on ourselves adequately if it ever came to that.
Take care!
Hayah
JazakhAllah khairan sister, i will keep that in mind inshAllah..xox
Post a Comment