COME BACK!!

As-salaam alaikum warahmatullah wa barakatuhu...

Its me again! Remember me?? That complicated muslimah 0_o.. SubhanAllah its been ages since i last blogged i always forget i own a blog :(, I signd in to my google mail account and that is how i remembered i had a blog. As usual alot has happened and still happening I mean am even a year older... I really dont know where to start but we shall go with the flow..

So i have graduated from university and I am now an Economist as it is..:) (Alhamdulilah) you can say school out f the way but not too fast i have enrolled for my masters and as am typing now its on, tough am not even in school yet still stuck at home trying to sort things out inshAlla i'll be in there in a week..

Its Eid day today and Eid mubarak to you all..:) thats if there is anyone one like me who has time to come on blogger on Eid day..
I promise I'll be more constant with my blogging inshAllah..

Ok am off to go eat I mean its Eid (get the rhym..hehe)

Ma-salaam...

still complicated
xlxo

Salaams,

Been a while, complicated as usual, I have been in the mix between getting busy with school work(alhamdulilah) and shopping, gosh what a shopaholic i have become...sad, sad,sad.. but inshAllah today the 31/01/09 will mark the day i will hide my bank card most definatly, inshAllah i will only bring it out for emergency such as sever hunger, like seriously i dont need to buy anything in the near future, not even food(alhamdulilah)..am tryna go on a diet, my friend took a pic of me today and subhanAllah my face loooks like a big balooon, so yea bye bye 2 late nite munching(from tommorow, am starving now..:( )... ok so i really dont have much going on am really trying my best to stay on track shaitan is all around, too many temptations from people i dont expect it from..in fact that is just a long long story for another time(maybe lol), but yea am not making much sense so am like off inshAllah...

salaams,
Am back, not sure if its for good, but i'll deff try my best :P...not much has been hapnin, still complicated!! i went home for the winter holday, was really great except the d fact that i gained sm xtra KG!!! hopefully with serious studying and eating ones n a day(b-cuz i 4gt 2 eat) i will loose it soon I.A. So yea same ol same tryna make a new routine for my life, am begining 2 bcom lazy i mean sleeping after fajr , well u shudnt b suprised, like its 1.40am now and God knows why I am up blogging now...anyways since i have nothing good 2 say i might aswell reside 2 my bed,n i'll try 2 be back with a lil more information than this. ok than howki dowki....

urs truely,
complicated muslimah

Hello

Salaam,
So its been like ageeeeessss, i really cant imagine how long, i just happnd to go on my g-mail and tadaaa i ended up on this blog...so much has happend like seriously I was thinking to delete the blog i dont even know how to do that, i guess i might continue blogging...... ok so right now nothing out of the blue is happning in my life except the school work of cause and little bit of this and that, been going for al-kauthar courses and am loving it..cant wait for the mark of the jurist, already booked my place..:P, you should too...ok so i should be going now, need to write a 1500 words essay tonight and hand it in before 12pm tommorow like seriously am such a last minute person anyways stay tuned, or maybe not..:D.

urs truly,
complicated muslimah,
xoxo

Emotions!!

Bismulahi Rahmani Raheem,

As-salaam Alaikum wa rahmatulah wa barakatuhu,

what is the definition of emotions anybody??....OK i think am just gonna change topics now, its to deep for me to discuss because i cannot even make sense of it. some times you sacrifice things you desire for s better promise you believe to be true, you give up things that have been part of your life so you can get the promised one. you forsake people that have been there for you so you will get what you have promised. all this little sacrifices for the little worldly things will be you price for the everlasting hereafter(I.A).

sometimes when you really want something so bad, but you cant have it because it leads you to another part far away from the everlasting abode. Its sad sometimes when I sit and think why hurting for just this Little temporary things when you have been promised a better incomparable one. this is life, and it will end. all the worldly things will end, you too will come to an end someday, so why stress for the temporary, why go for a part time enjoyment when you have an alternative of an everlasting happiness, why oh why?

it is really hard sometimes to answer your own question addressed to yourself. sometimes you feel you are not doing the right thing but you just keep up with it because you are enjoying it. why spend all your hard earned money and labour for just the little things that do not last? you can have all the world but you will never be satisfied, the more you get the more you desire and the more miserable you get. then you don't we settle for the little we have and use our time to earn for the one that lasts for ever, the one where we will be very satisfied? indeed human are so irrational and imperfect. they think they know but little they know. everyday we have economist and pshycologist coming up with new theories for the world, but none of this are accurate NONE!! so why then don't we realise who we have to give credit to, why then haven't we realised ........OK i really have to run now am running late for the sisters circle, i might continue depending on how i really feel later...

p.s. Erm Am Kinna just blabbing to my self just in case it doesn't make any sense to you, my head was getting a lil bit too full of my imperfections and i wanted to just remind myself bout all that i mentioned...so pay no attention to it if you don't understand....

Ma-salaam..xox

The Importance of Gratitude

Summer

Bismilahi Rahmani Raheem,

As-salaam Alaikum Wa Rahmatulahi Wa Barakatuhu,

My perfect summer.... I really cant even remember my daydream anymore :(..seriously. I had it all perfectly planned by Fantasizing bout it in my head but now its all gone (I have been doing allot of maths maybe that's why!)..

OK basically I always wanted to learn Arabic since this time last year, when I decided to come back to Islam (practicing i mean), my point was so i can understand the Quran when i read it..well yeah last summer i got loads(OK maybe 2) books to learn Arabic but i got bored of teaching myself, then when i resumed fully for my 2ND year I applied to do Arabic, my dad obediently approved of it funny enough(b/c I never mentioned it ever and i called asking him to wire some money for me to apply)...we'll it wasn't meant to be after I got loads of advice from my Guru economic mates that it might affect my performance because if i fail Arabic it will pull down my final result, obviously i ignored them (b/c they didn't know how much i wanted to learn). Well i did apply and the time table came out and guess what????? All the Arabic classes where clashing with my economic 1Ce, i did hustle with all my strength going up and down waiting hours to speak to the tutor so i can have my special 1 on 1 lesson (who did i think i was then...ha ha, daughter of the pioneer of the uni..loll) well obviously i didn't get to do my beloved Arabic course, but yea i still didn't lose hope, I signed up to do an online Arabic course with a teacher in Egypt twice a week meet via Skye (I know it sounds dodgy..loll) but yea I did sign up, but wow i could not handle the teacher he was SO impatient with me especially the fact that i do not understand any Arabic but he was so good mash Allah , but yeah i decided not to do it with him. Then finally i had 1 more option left, Wednesday night with a student form the Islamic society it was free as well, obviously i did go and i attended but it was slow plus she was a student so she really wasn't the best (may Allah reward her for her effort), I did learn a bit so i can say somethings and i understand allot (seriously, especially when i read the Quran {'_*}) but yeah that was for that we have the exam on Wednesday ha ha I'll let you know my result if i pass. so that was for that the whole story of my Arabic quest...but it all leads to my summer plan...

OK i found a school in Egypt with perfect timing for me to learn Classical intensive Arabic for the period of two months, the school is very good as it was recommended by someone reliable so am sure I'll be getting good out of it, though its very cheap but i trust in Allah ('_')...its for a period of two months and they also offer tajweed isn't that WONDERFUL seriously it will be a dream come true if by September i can speak Arabic and read the quran with melody, wow, you lot will see allot of me on you tube reciting the quran..(just kidding OB).

Now after the big dream I come back to reality, I haven't asked my dad, its a bit twisted because i did not tell him that i did not do the other Arabic course (and if i do now I'll look fraudulent for not mentioning it or returning him money)... I wrote down a long text message about 3-4 pages long( a week ago) and all i need to do is just click the send button, but really am just scared of hearing a NO! ohhh no it will just shatter my dreams... I have a feeling if he says yes i will defiantly get a first in my finals (though its Allah who will bless me with that, I'll put as much effort). Wow if he says no i haven't even got a plan B for the 4 months break... anyways that my summer dream and lot of you will think am kuku ha ha but that's just my short term goal because i believe it will open so many doors for me (understanding what am saying during prayers and having better kushoo, also easy to learn the dua's, and the recitation will be easier insh Allah).

After boring you lot with my plans is left for you to make du'a for me insh Allah that h says yes and also that it will be easy for me to cope and learn the language with good application and to also manage the Egyptian heat..:P, cant wait insh Allah

Ma-salaam...x